3 counterintuitive secrets of top CEOs (hint: it's not perfectionism)

THE ART & SCIENCE OF LEADING SELF
The Illusion of Control

Today, I want to share how you move through that illusion into a more healthy place of leadership.

This brings us to a powerful concept that is central to mindset: detachment. Imagine you're tending a garden. You carefully select your seeds, prepare the soil, and plant everything just so.

"I've got this," you think.

"My plan and efforts will ensure the garden grows the way I set it up."

But nature has other plans. No matter how precisely you've planned and planted, your actual control over the outcome is far less than you imagine.

Leadership is much the same.

Leadership is “the activity of influencing people by providing purpose, direction, and motivation to accomplish the mission and improve the organization.”¹

I love this definition because it emphasizes that leadership is influence that shapes the process - it does not control the outcomes. Influence is different than control, which, again, is an illusion. But don’t just take my word for it.

Psychologists define the illusion of control as your tendency to overestimate your ability to control events.²

It's a mental security blanket you wrap yourself in, especially when facing uncertainty. This illusion, while comforting in the short term, often leads to:

1. Increased stress and burnout 🆘

2. Stifled innovation and team creativity 😱

3. Missed opportunities due to rigid thinking 🤦‍♀️

4. Decreased adaptability in the face of change ‼️

It doesn’t have to be this way. You can lead with more grace and less stress. That's where the power of detachment comes in.

Detachment doesn't mean not caring. It's about caring deeply while loosening your grip on outcomes. Let's break down 3 key insights that top CEOs know about detachment. Peering behind this curtain can transform your leadership. 

1. Detachment Reduces Decision-Making Errors 🌟

When you're too attached to outcomes, you often make decisions based on fear or the need to be right. This can lead to decisions that clearly go against what the data show. Detachment gives you emotional distance, providing a broader perspective.

This helps you make more objective, balanced decisions.

Detachment doesn't mean you care less – it means you can see more.

2. Embracing Uncertainty Lowers Stress 🎉

Leadership can sometimes feel like trying to build a house during an earthquake. Markets shift, technologies disrupt, pandemics happen. When you're attached to the illusion that you can control everything, uncertainty can skyrocket your stress levels.

But when you accept that some things are beyond your control – just like a gardener accepts they can't control the weather – you actually reduce your stress. Detachment isn't about not caring about outcomes. It's about understanding that you influence them – you cannot control them.

3. Detachment Fosters Adaptability 🎯

In today's fast-paced world, adaptability isn't just nice to have – it's essential. Well, detachment is your secret weapon for becoming more adaptable.

When you're too attached to your plans or ideas, you become rigid. But when you practice detachment, you open yourself up to new possibilities. Detachment allows you to hold your ideas and plans lightly, making it easier to adapt when circumstances change.

FROM INSIGHT TO ACTION
Embracing Uncertainty: An Exercise

Embracing detachment in leadership isn't about relinquishing responsibility. It's about leading in a way that enhances decision making, empowers you to embrace uncertainty, and cultivates adaptability. By loosening your grip on the illusion of control, you open yourself up to new possibilities for leading yourself and others with confidence.

Ready to put detachment into practice? Try this "Embracing Uncertainty" exercise:

Step 1: Identify Your Control Hotspots

Ask yourself:

• What areas of my work or life am I trying to control with an iron grip?

• Where do I feel the most anxiety when things don't go as planned?

Step 2: Imagine the Possibilities

For each item on your list, brainstorm three potential positive outcomes that could result from loosening your grip on the illusion of control.

Step 3: Create an Action Plan

For each item on your list, come up with one small, concrete step you can take to practice detachment and embrace uncertainty.

Step 4: Practice Mindful Observation

As you implement your action plan, pay close attention to your thoughts and feelings. You might notice anxiety creeping in, or an urge to try to control outcome. That's completely normal!

Step 5: Reflect and Adjust

After a week of practicing your designed actions, take some time to reflect. What worked well? What was challenging? Did any unexpected positive outcomes emerge? 

➡️ Give the "Embracing Uncertainty" exercise a try this week. You might be surprised by what your leadership unlocks when you stop trying to control every outcome.

Remember, true leadership isn't about controlling everything – it's about creating the conditions for success and growth, even in the face of uncertainty. Effective self-leadership requires that you start by establishing those conditions within yourself.

EXCELLENCE UNBOUNDED
How I Can Help You

🚀 CEO Coaching Programs: Are you a CEO who wants to:

• Skillfully navigate uncertainty 

• Lead confidently

• Drive results

Developing greater leadership capacity in 4 key domains (Mindset, Courage, Resilience, & Innovation) will empower you to do all three.

Book time to learn about the bespoke 1:1 coaching programs I deliver. During this call, we will talk about your challenges, your goals, and how we might partner to fully “unbound your excellence.”

🎤 Speaking Engagements: My mom can attest to the fact that I LOVE to talk. 😂 Now, I put that talent to work delivering talks on Mindset, Courage, Resilience, & Innovation.

A few past clients include KraftHeinz, Amazon Women @ Payments, PAHEi, & the Panamá Chapter of the International Coaching Federation (I delivered this talk in Spanish).

If you are interested in having me speak at your event, please fill out this form.

Until next week,

Shawnette