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THE ART & SCIENCE OF LEADING SELF
The Power of Behavior

My friend, I’ve been walking you through my entire framework for Mindset the past few weeks. To make it easier to visualize, I’ve been using the analogy of a house. Here’s a quick recap of the structure:

• Foundation: Mindset work is a function of mindfulness (M = f(m))

• Framing: Subject–Object shift

• Flooring: Detachment

To help you recognize the value of practicing detachment, I’ve been stepping you through a 3-part framework that equips you to identify attachments. So far, we’ve explored two indicators:

1. Feelings → the thermostat: internal sensations that signal something’s off

2. Language → the thresholds: the words that reveal where you’re clinging or letting go

Today, we complete the attachment framework by turning to the third indicator: Behavior.

Before we go further, here’s a quick reminder of the definition we’ve been using:

That clinging doesn’t stay hidden. It expresses itself through your behavior, even if you don’t notice it.

So, if feelings are the thermostat and language the thresholds, then behavior is the electrical wiring inside the house.

It carries the charge of your internal state and makes it visible. Sometimes it flows smoothly. Sometimes it sparks. Other times, it shorts the whole system.

The Indicator Everyone Else Sees First 📡

One reason behavior matters so much is that it’s the one indicator of attachment everyone else sees (whether you’re aware of it or not).

Your team may not know what you’re feeling. They may not catch the nuance in your language. But they will always notice how you behave.

Behavior is the visible extension of what’s happening inside you.

It’s how attachment manifests when you don’t even realize it’s there.

That’s why it’s an important indicator to get curious about in your self-leadership. Because your behavior sends signals. Signals that shape culture, influence trust, and tell others what truly matters to you.

And when your behavior contradicts your stated values or strategy?

People acknowledge your words, but they believe what you do. 👈🏽

Snapshot: Chief Human Resources Officer 👤

Attachment: Identity as “the bridge” between admin and clinical teams

The CHRO of a regional hospital system sees herself as the connector between leadership and frontline clinical staff.

But instead of hosting joint problem-solving sessions, she filters communication through side conversations and separate updates. Her behavior looks like helpful translation. But it’s powered by an attachment to being the sole bridge.

The result?

Miscommunication, deepened silos, and a growing disconnect between strategy and delivery.

Why Awareness Precedes Alignment 🧭

This is where the foundation of the mindset house we have been building, M = f(m), matters most.

You can’t rewire a system you’re unwilling or unable to see. And without mindfulness, your behavior will just follow old circuitry (well-reinforced neural pathways). That’s how patterns persist.

You think you’re leading from strategy or purpose, but your actions are powered by fear, ego, the need for control, etc.

Mindfulness is what creates the space for you to pause and observe.

It’s what empowers you to stop, notice your behavior, and ask:

• What’s really driving this?

• What attachment might be hiding underneath this reaction?

• What outcome do I actually want to create here?

That moment of inquiry gives you a choice. That choice opens up space. 💡 And that space is where alignment becomes possible.

This Is Self-Leadership in Action 📦

Remember this? 👇🏽

When you’re aware of your behavior and its roots, you can step back. You can detach from the surge of the moment. And you can lead from clarity instead of clinging.

The three indicators of attachment offer you real-time tools to spot where you may be grasping:

1. Feelings → the thermostat

2. Language → the thresholds

3. Behavior → the wiring

That moment of awareness empowers you to make the conscious choice to open the door to detachment instead.

As we close today’s issue, I invite you to consider:

What story might your leadership behavior be telling without you uttering a word?

MAKE YOUR VOICE HEARD 📢

EXCELLENCE UNBOUNDED
How I Can Help You

High-performing executive teams don’t happen by chance. They happen by design.

Aligned Senior Leaders Are:

✅ 1.9x more likely to achieve above-average financial performance
✅ 2.5x more likely to have satisfied and engaged employees

Aligned Companies Are:

✅ 58% faster revenue growth
✅ 72% more profitable

Misaligned companies underperform in the following ways:

❌ 50% lower ROIC
❌ 18% lower EBITDA
❌ 25% loss of revenue
❌ Reduced productivity
❌ Slower strategic execution

Book a call to learn more about The Executive Alignment Playbook 🚀, an immersive, experiential leadership program.

Realign your leadership team. Accelerate execution. Drive measurable results.

🎤 Speaking Engagements: My mom can attest to the fact that I LOVE to talk. 😂 Now, I put that talent to work delivering talks on Mindset, Courage, Resilience, & Innovation.

A few past clients include KraftHeinz, Amazon Women @ Payments, PAHEi, & the Panamá Chapter of the International Coaching Federation (I delivered this talk in Spanish).

If you are interested in having me speak at your event, please fill out this form.